So you want me to tell you about the best curriculum to use for your 1st, 7th, pre-K or 82nd grader?  Uh-uh! Oh no, sister!  You’re going to have to figure all that out on your own!  Set me up for that kind of …. mutter, scoff, mumble… vicious attack and ridicule…mutter, mumble…pencils and protractors hurled at my math preferences…..mumble, snort….too much money, phew….not enough creative control….blah, blah….creation vs.uncle and aunt ape…..Lord, no! I’d rather discuss how to build walls and burn bridges with Trump or how to avoid pesky government spam with Hillary!

There are brave and possibly bored insomniac label-loving, categorizing bloggers who will break things down for you as best as they can into religious, secular, teaching styles, desired time schedules, classical, eclectic, year-round, self propelling, hands-on, hands-off, requires both hands and a whip, etc. Which is great and very helpful.  So, get reading.  There are a bajillion descriptions and reviews of curriculum on the web. Do your own homework! I spent months of late nights, early mornings, and caffeine highs reading and comparing, and I’ll not cheat you out of such fun.

And I’ll not have you being lazy and taking my word for it, then end up being less than satisfied, and thus return to burn me at the stake for wasting your time and money because you read about something awesome when you finally decided to crack a homeschool forum. See, I’ve read all that already and I chose what I chose because I liked it best for my kids. Jokes on you, my friend.

Maybe we should just go back to the dawn of our rebellion against the institution and instead of calling it “Homeschooling” we should just rename it “Do Your Thang,” that way we declare our freedom and still sound kind of chill. Because, lets be honest, we’re not exactly a united bunch marching to the same goal.

Aaaah! Put your finger down, and don’t interrupt. Yes, I know we’re all working towards happy, well adjusted, successful, smart graduates.  But I guarantee my idea of smart and well adjusted is different than many homeschool moms out there.  Let’s not argue the details.  That’s the point.  You march East and I’ll march West.  And I can’t tell you how to march East if I don’t like the sun in my eyes in the morning when I’m drinking my coffee.

First and foremost, you’ve got to figure which direction you’re going to march. You might find a few heading that direction too. But beware creating a band, cause as soon as you bond over a good writing curriculum, they’ll break formation and veer South.  You don’t have to feel abandoned.  Remember, “Do Your Thang.”  March in a zigzag if it’s your “Thang.”

It also seems that everyone in the world is looking to either fight or be a victim of something these days. And this has spilled over into the homeschooling world as well. When you start reading those reviews I’ve assigned for your homework, just you wait!  Every other review will contradict the one before.

Saxon math will bore your children to tears.

Saxon math is the best because is spirals and concepts are not forgotten.

Saxon math is not fair to visual learners because the print is so dull.

Saxon math is to blame for childs stammer and lack of confidence in his marriage.

You get the idea.

You have an opinion and a thousand people are lined up to tell you why you’re wrong. Newsflash, opinions can’t be wrong.  Don’t get your paperclips in a knot!  Just point your direction and “Do Your Thang.”

I’ve told some close homeschool friends what we use for curriculum when they were desperate for help getting started. But, I always throw a disclaimer in the book bag:

This curriculum is what works for us today. I reserve the right to disagree with myself tomorrow and deny anything I claim to be true today as pertains to the usage of the aforementioned curriculum with or without a warning or a book burning.

Oh, and Saxon math rocks!

The Day I Wanted to Quit Homeschooling

” …And then I do the lowest thing we homeschool moms know to do when backed into a corner feeling all hope is lost…I tell them I am taking them back to public school in the fall.”

Against my Will, How I Became a Homeschool Mom

But still, they’ll be weird and homely looking, right? And I’ll have to wear a denim jumper and sell strange oils!

Yes, My Kids Have Asked to go to School

And it was like being stabbed in the heart with the pretty blue math compass I bought him for 5th grade math! “… I just wanted to see what middle school is like and meet some new friends.” …I’m not protecting him. I’m providing him with an alternate route with which to emerge having lost none of himself.

We Burned Down the Kitchen for Science Fair This Year

Disclaimer: If you work for, or are planning to contact child protective services, I totally made all of this up. Especially the part about getting it on video.

Homeschooling is Making Me Fat

Academic pursuit is a stationary exercise. Homeschooling is making me fat. As the kids age and their academic demand increases, so does the surface area of the homeschool mom’s rear end. Homeschool moms must get creative to keep moving as the kids get older. Here are some possible ways to get moving…

100 Homeschool Memes

Memes. They can cram an entire argument into one witty frame. Homeschoolers can hold their own when it comes to great memes. Here is a list of 100 great homeschool memes from some great bloggers and artists including yours truly. Plus, get to the end and find out how to enter to win $100!

Halloween Anatomy Lesson; A Gross Out Game of Pass the Parts

Seeing as though it's the month of October, and all things spicy and creepy are wafting in the air, Is there need of any other reason to drop everything 'curriculum', paint our faces, light a fire, tell ghoulish stories, and roast marshmallows by...

Even Homeschool Moms Form Cliques And Other Things I Have Learned While Homeschooling

Turns out, I have also accumulated a few trinkets of homeschool wisdom along the way…#13 Just go to the movies. CPS is not camped out behind the neighbors begonias. If public schools can take all day field trips to six flags and call it educational, you can go see the new Diary of a Wimpy Kid and call it journalism.

Things All Kids Should Learn To Do for the Love of Wi-Fi

“And so, for the exhausted moms who no longer find their children’s ability to dress themselves awe inspiring, I have compiled an accessory list of milestones for the adolescent who depends on overworked parents for food and a good internet connection.”

But What if My Kid is Just…Normal? A Satire

Because really it is quite an accomplishment these days to be one of the not too smart, but not too slow, not too talented, yet modestly skilled, healthy, yet not extraordinarily athletic, average, mostly compliant, not to outspoken, but not too withdrawn, miraculously middle of the road, normal kids. But how boring to be just…normal.

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