So you want me to tell you about the best curriculum to use for your 1st, 7th, pre-K or 82nd grader?  Uh-uh! Oh no, sister!  You’re going to have to figure all that out on your own!  Set me up for that kind of …. mutter, scoff, mumble… vicious attack and ridicule…mutter, mumble…pencils and protractors hurled at my math preferences…..mumble, snort….too much money, phew….not enough creative control….blah, blah….creation vs.uncle and aunt ape…..Lord, no! I’d rather discuss how to build walls and burn bridges with Trump or how to avoid pesky government spam with Hillary!

There are brave and possibly bored insomniac label-loving, categorizing bloggers who will break things down for you as best as they can into religious, secular, teaching styles, desired time schedules, classical, eclectic, year-round, self propelling, hands-on, hands-off, requires both hands and a whip, etc. Which is great and very helpful.  So, get reading.  There are a bajillion descriptions and reviews of curriculum on the web. Do your own homework! I spent months of late nights, early mornings, and caffeine highs reading and comparing, and I’ll not cheat you out of such fun.

And I’ll not have you being lazy and taking my word for it, then end up being less than satisfied, and thus return to burn me at the stake for wasting your time and money because you read about something awesome when you finally decided to crack a homeschool forum. See, I’ve read all that already and I chose what I chose because I liked it best for my kids. Jokes on you, my friend.

Maybe we should just go back to the dawn of our rebellion against the institution and instead of calling it “Homeschooling” we should just rename it “Do Your Thang,” that way we declare our freedom and still sound kind of chill. Because, lets be honest, we’re not exactly a united bunch marching to the same goal.

Aaaah! Put your finger down, and don’t interrupt. Yes, I know we’re all working towards happy, well adjusted, successful, smart graduates.  But I guarantee my idea of smart and well adjusted is different than many homeschool moms out there.  Let’s not argue the details.  That’s the point.  You march East and I’ll march West.  And I can’t tell you how to march East if I don’t like the sun in my eyes in the morning when I’m drinking my coffee.

First and foremost, you’ve got to figure which direction you’re going to march. You might find a few heading that direction too. But beware creating a band, cause as soon as you bond over a good writing curriculum, they’ll break formation and veer South.  You don’t have to feel abandoned.  Remember, “Do Your Thang.”  March in a zigzag if it’s your “Thang.”

It also seems that everyone in the world is looking to either fight or be a victim of something these days. And this has spilled over into the homeschooling world as well. When you start reading those reviews I’ve assigned for your homework, just you wait!  Every other review will contradict the one before.

Saxon math will bore your children to tears.

Saxon math is the best because is spirals and concepts are not forgotten.

Saxon math is not fair to visual learners because the print is so dull.

Saxon math is to blame for childs stammer and lack of confidence in his marriage.

You get the idea.

You have an opinion and a thousand people are lined up to tell you why you’re wrong. Newsflash, opinions can’t be wrong.  Don’t get your paperclips in a knot!  Just point your direction and “Do Your Thang.”

I’ve told some close homeschool friends what we use for curriculum when they were desperate for help getting started. But, I always throw a disclaimer in the book bag:

This curriculum is what works for us today. I reserve the right to disagree with myself tomorrow and deny anything I claim to be true today as pertains to the usage of the aforementioned curriculum with or without a warning or a book burning.

Oh, and Saxon math rocks!

I want to Homeschool, But I Don’t Want to Teach

I want to be the kind of homeschool mom who can wedge herself in between Webster’s Dictionary and a selection of Usborne Encyclopedia’s …and I’d just hop down from my shelf to run out and buy pre-sharpened Ticonderogas, arrange field trips, keep the WiFi running, and set out tea for the college recruiters. Anything’s possible….

More Tea, Sir? A Valentine’s Tea Party for Dudes

Of course girls love tea parties!  But have you ever been to the boys’ table? Some of the many benefits of inviting the man cubs to the lace covered table go largely unnoticed, and are as follows…

If Homeschool Moms Had to Undergo Teacher Evaluations…Pass or Fail?

“You cannot measure speed with a thermometer. And you cannot measure the quality of a uniquely designed plan of individualized education using a checklist for manufactured drones.
However, we are capable of evaluating ourselves.”…

If Scarlett O’Hara was a Homeschool Mom

Lawsy me, just call me Mizz Scarlet! I’m not into stealing husbands or anything. I barely tolerate my own at times. But I’m no Melanie Hamilton. I’m going to flaunt my homeschooling efforts around in red velvet, feathers, and an unapologetic raised eyebrow of defiance.

He Said. She Said. A Homeschool Marriage.

This is your marriage on homeschooling. It is an ever changing rollercoaster of ups, downs, sacrifices, strains and reasons to light each other on fire. Tell it to the judge!
He said: Let the record show that I was just resting my eyes during her reading of Shakespeare.
She said: Your Honor, I swear I did not wear these pajamas all day!

Even Homeschool Moms Form Cliques And Other Things I Have Learned While Homeschooling

Turns out, I have also accumulated a few trinkets of homeschool wisdom along the way…#13 Just go to the movies. CPS is not camped out behind the neighbors begonias. If public schools can take all day field trips to six flags and call it educational, you can go see the new Diary of a Wimpy Kid and call it journalism.

The First Day of School is a Phantom Holiday

Do homeschooled kids feel the same spirit of the season? This time of year….the $1 bins are brimming with glue sticks and useless shaped erasers, I can’t help but feel the excitement in the air. Like Christmas. Seriously. It’s nostalgic and filled with possibilities! Or a phantom holiday…. like we had busted open a piñata and all that came out were pencil shavings and spelling words.

The Sun Does Not Shine Out of My Arse; A Very Real Homeschool Day

We owe it to the homeschool newbies to keep it real… Some days all mine want to do is binge watch SpongeBob and gorge on peanut butter stuffed pretzels. And I’d like to hideout in my room and binge watch the back of my eyelids, but this stuff won’t learn itself!

101 Lies I Tell Myself About Homeschooling

A hilarious list of 101 homeschool lies we tell ourselves under the pressure for perfection and the desire for the outside world to pat us on the back. Dreams of educational success lead to grand expectations and impossible goals we can’t begin to complete when life gets in the way.

Chalk it Up, Before the Wind Changes

But know that, like anything warm and wonderful, it won’t last. However, the art is in the making of the memory. The smiles and fun shared are etched into the heart and take on a sweet forlorn hue.

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